So maybe your child has challenging behavior. But what is the behavior you want MORE of.
SPOTLIGHT ON THE BEHAVIOR YOU WANT.
Take a picture of it..
Notice it. Say what you see.
FaceTime your mom about it. Call their dad about it.
Spend the whole day talking about these things!
Read MoreI’m very intentional on the materials that I include in my outdoor space.
Instead of getting the typical big playground/swing set.
I decided to include all the elements I valued most.
If all you can fit or want is a swing-set that’s great too!
One reason I decided against the swing set is because I don’t want to spend 10 years doing under-doggies. I’m sorry #notthatmom.
Second, there’s “rules“ typically that come with the swingsets…(don’t climb up the slide, one at a time on the ladder, one at a time on the swing, don’t walk in front of the swing, there’s not room for you right here, etc.)
I wanted play materials that allowed them to expand their imagination.
Read MoreYou had a bad day.
That sucks, How dare they, Such terrible luck
vs.
You had a bad day
What did you learn from it?
When you start saying things like 2019 isn't my year. This year is the worst... soon all the little bad things become paralyzing. I can't handle one more thing. instead, we can say, you know this was REALLY hard... and look at where I was to where I am now... that's empowering!
.
.
How many adults do you know stuck in this victim mentality? Are they pleasant to be around? Let's help our kids learn to reframe their story in a way that empowers.
Read MoreSometimes we jive a little bit easier with certain stages of our kids' development. Or certain personalities within the family. This can create competition, sometimes resentment... and all of it because of an innocent match in temperament and interests. A quick cure for this... a handwritten note to each kid once a month. Let them know I'm so glad you are MINE. Not because of anything you say or do. Not because of your grades. Not because of your interests or successes. But because you are you. And you are mine.
Read MoreMy kid is CRAZY and STUBBORN will you watch him for the day? How does this make you feel... NOPE, run.
vs.
My kid is DECISIVE and has some serious LEADERSHIP potential, can you watch him for today? Yeah, I could do that.
Let's play a game, take out a paper and write down all the negative labels you might use for your "spirited" child. And then write a way to reframe a label positively next to it. I'll get us started.
Read MoreWhich means, conflict is normal, crying is normal, all the feels can be felt...
With this mantra and instead of trying to avoid them or feeling like you're FAILING because conflict and crying is happening... we WELCOME them. We work through them. We problem solve together.
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