Being different isn't always a bad thing. In fact in this ever-changing evil world... we NEED strong-willed children that will stand up for their values.
Yet when they're the kid running up on the stand at church... or wearing PJ's to school because they refuse every other outfit... this strong-willed characteristic is frustrating.
We can offer independence, responsibilities, choices within the boundaries to foster this autonomy without losing all authority.
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"Mom, I go help dad. Got mine tools"
Every two-ish weeks we rotate toys. #xoplaytime
This means that I switch out baskets of a few doctors supplies -- to baskets of a few tools. I always have some sort of block. And the art center is always there. But, it doesn't take much to change the entire tone of the playroom. All of a sudden he's going from wrapping his babies in leftover gauze, to going out to the shop and hammering stuff with dad. You don't even really need to invest in tools just start saving the hex screws and wrenches from the ikea/amazon furniture.
Having different materials invites Charlie to change the focus of his play and explore pretending in a new way. Gosh, play is fun and I love being his mom.
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Being a mother is a thankless job.
Which can sometimes cause burn out, feeling inadequate and like you need 6 of you cuz you can’t possibly be stretched any further.
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But you are enough.
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You are actually the most important human in the world to your kids.
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If they whine/cry to you it’s because they feel safe expressing their emotions with you.
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If they come to you with tattle tale after tattle tale, it’s because they trust you to fix their problems.
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If they end up in your room night after night, it’s because they want to be close to you.
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If they are jealous of their siblings, it’s because they want all of your love.
♥︎ Even though this is a thankless job,
Your kids are thanking you every time they trust you as the one to cry to, every time they trust you as the one they snuggle in their bed, everything they call you to tell you about something so insignificant.
They know YOU will always listen.
They know YOU always know what to do.
They know YOU love them no matter what.
This day was created so we could all say thank you.
And even though it can be hard if you lost your mom, have infertility, don’t want to become a mother... there’s always a mother somewhere to celebrate.
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Believe me, I’ve had my fair share of STOP WHINING!!!! moments. But I realize too that it’s a lose lose if I get to that point.
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For little annoying behaviors like whining. We don’t ignore them, give them what they want then come back to a green arrow moment later. We do the teaching right then.
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You can ask nicely. Say, “I want the dinosaur show please” *repeat* “ok now you do it” *does on own*
This is the only way whining will commence. There has to be consistent teaching of what they SHOULD do. Not just what they shouldn’t.
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I don't have games on my phone. But I do have this ONE free app, that I use as a tool to teach prosocial behaviors.
Any other amazing apps out there that are parent hacks... drop em below!
Meet, the Mouse Timer. This app is a timer that shows several different time options. You click the time you need and then when the mouse eats the cheese the timer is up.
Charlie often has a hard time taking turns with his cousin. So, we pulled out the mouse timer. "When the mice eats the cheese, then it's Pipers turn" Then while Piper had her turn Charlie kept checking in to see how many more apples were left before the mouse got the cheese.
Another thing that would work would just be a digital timer that they can see moving or counting down. It's so hard for kids to conceptualize time, but if they can see ok... I can have a turn in 15 apples... I'm going to survive. It usually goes a lot smoother.
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